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Biden’s Presidential Address


LumRaiderFan

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Heck, I’ll do it for him.

 

My fellow Americans, and Democrats.   In my short term in office here are my accomplishments.   My first was to put thousands of Americans out of work and hopefully made many of them dependent on the Democrats, err, I mean government.   My second big achievement was to open the borders, by inviting millions to come into our country illegally, and encouraged Congress to put them on the dole.  That means most will be Democrats since we give them free stuff.  In addition, it keeps everyone focused on the border so they won’t realize how inept I am.  And third, I got Congress to pass a Bill mangling the National Debt, under the guise of Covid Relief, and less than 10% was for Covid.  Almost all the rest was blue state relief since their Governors are as inept as I am.  Forth, I canceled all the Executive Oders Trump did making America first, to aid China in becoming the world economic leader.   Yes comrades, err, fellow Americans, I achieved all this in less than two months, and I have 5 years and 14 months to do even more.   Now it’s after 7 pm and I’ve got to get back in my basement where I have an inverted pentagram and I pray to Satan, Belial, and Leviathan.

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10 minutes ago, Hagar said:

Heck, I’ll do it for him.

 

My fellow Americans, and Democrats.   In my short term in office here are my accomplishments.   My first was to put thousands of Americans out of work and hopefully made many of them dependent on the Democrats, err, I mean government.   My second big achievement was to open the borders, by inviting millions to come into our country illegally, and encouraged Congress to put them on the dole.  That means most will be Democrats since we give them free stuff.  In addition, it keeps everyone focused on the border so they won’t realize how inept I am.  And third, I got Congress to pass a Bill mangling the National Debt, under the guise of Covid Relief, and less than 10% was for Covid.  Almost all the rest was blue state relief since their Governors are as inept as I am.  Forth, I canceled all the Executive Oders Trump did making America first, to aid China in becoming the world economic leader.   Yes comrades, err, fellow Americans, I achieved all this in less than two months, and I have 5 years and 14 months to do even more.   Now it’s after 7 pm and I’ve got to get back in my basement where I have an inverted pentagram and I pray to Satan, Belial, and Leviathan.

The wife said she saw where he has to give a SOTU address. Kinda like a marriage that’s not consummated. Me, I don’t know. 

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7 minutes ago, baddog said:

The wife said she saw where he has to give a SOTU address. Kinda like a marriage that’s not consummated. Me, I don’t know. 

Here’s my thoughts on how he does function when he has too.   During the debates he was relatively lucid.  I think that his Doctors gave him an injection of something to achieve that (amphetamine, steroid, Red Bull?).   Whatever it was was dangerous to his health, so he could only get it periodically, thus the rest of the time he hid in the basement.  Based on how bad he’s gotten, I suspect that after this short term lucidity, after the injections wear off, he gets a little worse.   Saw him on TV yesterday, and as he was walking off, reporters were asking him questions, and he stood there with a blank look on his face before aides hustled him off.  Like a man that didn’t know where he was, or why someone was asking him questions.  I’ll be surprised if he’s President much longer.

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3 hours ago, CardinalBacker said:

He didn't look too hot last night. Just a little less composed and pasty/frail.

Some of his claims were exaggerated or misleading, but it wasn't confrontational at all.  I kinda liked that. 

Yeah, it wasn’t “in your face” confrontational, I guess. Just like the family friend who sneaked into his buddy’s daughter’s tent that summer when no one was looking to “check on her” and tells her how pretty she is and how no one will ever know... No loud noises, but someone’s damn sure getting violated. 

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3 hours ago, SmashMouth said:

Yeah, it wasn’t “in your face” confrontational, I guess. Just like the family friend who sneaked into his buddy’s daughter’s tent that summer when no one was looking to “check on her” and tells her how pretty she is and how no one will ever know... No loud noises, but someone’s damn sure getting violated. 

On a positive note, I would have gotten a stimulus payment today if I didn’t make so much money. 

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